I am seeing a psychiatrist through the public system. He continually tells me I am well now after 15 months. I get so perplexed by his reasonings I decided to write down my moods every day for a month and show him what I go through each day. I refuse to believe I am “well now” and will not give up until I get the message through that I need something to change because I am not normal. It’s an interesting exercise and I highly recommend it especially because you can get in touch with your own moods and feelings and you can show people exactly what is going on in your life on a day to day basis.
SCALE
0-3 = mild, 4-6 = moderate, 7-10 = extreme
28/9/2008
- Terrible shaking of hands 8/10 (Artane did not help) (*Artane is a drug for Parkinsons Disease)
- Disconnected from people 8/10
- Tension/anxiety 7/10
- Slight depression 2/10
- Interrupted sleep 4/10
- Blurred vision 8/10
- Lack of motivation 4/10
- Music in my head 4/10
- OCD cleaning 4/10
29/9/2008 (Period arrived)
- PMT stomach cramps 2/10
- Music in my head 2/10
- Shaky hands 4/10
- Anxiety 3/10
- Irritability 1/10
- Normality 8/10
- Excellent sleep 10/10
- Increased energy 7/10
30/9/2008
- Shaking of hands and legs 7/10
- Slurred speech 3/10
- Stomach cramps from period 4/10
- Anxiety/stress 3/10
- Decreased concentration 3/10
- Increased energy 7/10
- Depression (argument) 5/10
1/10/2008
- Low mood (from argument) 3/10
- Lack of concentration 5/10
- Fatigue 3/10
- Music in my head 3/10
2/10/2008 (Holiday)
- Lack of concentration 6/10
- Irritable 6/10
- Bad diet 8/10
- Apathy
- Depression (argument) 6/10
- Suicidal (argument) 4/10
- Music in my head 3/10
3/10/2008 (Holiday, period finishing)
- Confused relationship thoughts 9/10
- Sad face 6/10
- Shaking 2/10
- Bad diet 8/10
- Sick feeling 8/10
- Apathy 6/10
- Stress/anxiety 9/10
- Music in my head 3/10
4/10/2008 (Holiday, Period finishing)
- Tremor 5/10
- Depression 4/10
- Music in my head 3/10
5/10/2008 (Holiday, feel hormonal)
- Fantasy 8/10
- Non interest in environment and conversation 8/10
- Tremor 1/10
- Music in my head 3/10
6/10/2008 (Holiday, feel hormonal)
- Depression 4/10
- Tremor 6/10
- Fantasy 6/10
- Lack of interest in environment and conversation 6/10
- Insomnia 6/10
- Confused relationship thoughts 6/10
- Music in my head 3/10
7/10/2008 (Holiday, feel hormonal)
- Tremor 6/10
- Lack of interest in environment and conversation 5/10
- Lack of feeling 5/10
- No facial expression 7/10
- Music in my head 6/10
8/10/2008 (Holiday)
- Depression 4/10
- Lack of interest in environment and communication 7/10
- No motivation 6/10
- Dread/anxiety 5/10
- No appetite 5/10
- Sick feeling 4/10
- Music in my head 3/10
9/10/2008 (Holiday)
- Irritability 4/10
- Depression 3/10
- Apathy 5/10
- Lack of emotion
- Music in my head 3/10
10/10/2008 (Holiday)
- Fantasy 4/10
- Depression 5/10
- Music in my head 3/10
11/10/2008 (Back from holiday)
- Depression 4/10
- Suicidal thoughts 2/10
- Music in my head 3/10
12/10/2008 (Weekend/Sunday)
- Depression 6/10
- Anger 7/10
- Irritable 8/10
- No emotion 5/10
- Music in my head 3/10
13/10/2008 (Back to work/Monday)
- Depression 4/10
- Headache 3/10
- Twitching 3/10
- Speech difficulty 2/10
- Music in my head 3/10
14/10/2008
- Low concentration 3/10
- Speech difficulty 1/10
- Music in my head 3/10
15/10/2008
- Anxiety 4/10
- Twitching 1/10
- Tiredness 4/10
- Loss of appetite 3/10
- No music in my head!
16/10/2008
- Tiredness 6/10
- Low concentration 6/10
- Twitching 6/10
- Loneliness/isolation 5/10
- Racing thoughts 3/10
- Depression 6/10
- Hypomania/lack of sleep 8/10
- Melancholy 3/10
- Suicidal thoughts 3/10
- Fantasy 10/10
- No music in my head!
17/10/2008
- Fantasy 8/10
- Racing thoughts 6/10
- Depression 3/10
- Loss of appetite 3/10
- Period cramps 2/10
- Decreased need for sleep 4/10
- Music in my head 3/10
18/10/2008 (Saturday)
- Fantasy 4/10
- Anxiety 3/10
- Depression 6/10
- Confused relationship thoughts 2/10
- Disinterest in activities and conversation 4/10
- Music in my head 3/10
19/10/2008 (Sunday)
- No music in my head!
- Shaking/Tremor 2/10
- Depression 7/10
20/10/2008 (day off work)
- Depression 8/10
- Relationship difficulties 8/10
21/10/2008 (day off work)
- Depression 8/10
- Relationship Difficulties 8/10
- Twitching 4/10
22/10/2008 (day off work)
- Depression 4/10
- Shaking/twitching 6/10
23/10/2008
- Tension 5/10
- Depression 2/10
24/10/2008
- Tension 3/10
- Shaking 4/10
- OCD cleaning 4/10
25/10/2008 (Saturday)
- Shaking 6/10
- Stomach cramps (period) (morning after pill) 8/10
26/10/2008 (Sunday)
- Depression 4/10
- Confused relationship thoughts 2/10
27/10/2008 (Monday, back to work)
- Shaking/tension 4/10
- Depression/non interest in work environment 7/10
28/10/2008 (Period arrived)
- Shaking/twitching 4/10
- Non interest in work environment 5/10
- Fantasy 1/10
- Lack of interest in working environment 5/10
- Fantasy 1/10
29/10/2008
- Fantasy 9/10
- Insomnia 9/10
30/10/2008
- Depression 7/10
31/10/2008
- Fantasy 2/10
- Poor sleep /woke up tired & tense 8/10
- Shaking 5/10
1/11/2008
- Shaking 5/10
- Fantasy 2/10
- Depression 4/10
2/11/2008
- Fantasy 2/10
- Depression 5/10
- Suicidal thoughts/plans 3/10
3/11/2008 (Monday)
- Loneliness 3/10
- Depression 5/10
- Fantasy 3/10
- Anxiety 2/10
- Melancholia 2/10
- Delusional (preparing for date with fantasy man) 9/10
- Buying things for date 5/10
4/11/2008
- Mania consisting of listening to extremely loud music/erratic behavour and the following:
- Putting on makeup for fantasy date
- Buying things 4/10
- Risky driving 4/10
- Racing thoughts 8/10
- Increased energy 6/10
- Fantasizing 6/10
- By afternoon down to Depression 7/10
- Shaking 5/10
- Loud & repetitive music in my head 7/10
5/11/2008
- Woke up tired
- Lack of interest in working 4/10
- Depression 5/10
- Shaking 2/10
- Anti-social 6/10
- Lack of concentration 3/10
- Fantasy 3/10
6/11/2008
- Anxiety/panic attack going outside for lunch 6/10
- Depression 4/10
- Tiredness 8/10
- Loss of appetite 4/10
- Lack of interest in work environment 6/10
- Difficulty sleeping/getting to sleep 3/10
7/11/2008
- Music in my head 6/10
- Poor sleep 6/10
- Starving myself 8/10
- Suicidal (argument) 6/10
- Depression (argument) 4/10
8/11/2008 MEDICATION CHANGE TO ZELDOX 60MG EVENING 40 DAY
- Poor sleep 6/10
- Situational depression 3/10
- Anxiety shopping 4/10
9/11/2008
- Shaking 5/10
- Suicide attempt (argument)
- Indecisive 6/10
10/11/2008 120mg ZELDOX EVENING 40MG DAY
- Racing thoughts/lots of energy
- Shaking 6/10
11/11/2008 60MG ZELDOX EVENING 40 DAY
- Shaking 8/10
- Fantasy 3/10
12/11/2008
- Woke up tired 6/10
- Music in my head
- Shaking 8/10
13/11/2008
- Music in my head 3/10
- Woke up tired 3/10
- Restlessness 5/10
- Shaking
- Lethargy 7/10
14/11/2008
- Lethargy 2/10
- Music in my head 2/10
- Shaking 4/10
15/11/2008
- Shaking 5/10
- Music in my head 2/10
16/11/2008
- Shaking 5/10
- Music in my head 4/10
- Depression (argument) 7/10
- Suicidal thoughts 4/10
- Panic attack 5/10
- Lethargy 4/10
17/11/2008
- Shaking 4/10
- Depression 5/10
- Lethargy 2/10
- Tiredness 4/10
18/11/2008 CAT TEAM VISIT
- Shaking 8/10
- Depression 4/10
- Tiredness/Cranky/Inability to work 6/10
Funny you talk about the music in the head symptom. Some forums say its a form of OCD. I have OCD cleaning so I put it down to that HOWEVER once I went off the Zeldox the music in my head ceased. It was starting to become rather annoying and frustrating let me tell you!
It is interesting looking at your symptom chart; it’s not what I thought you meant. I should do this more often as well, but so far I only do it when I can tell the symptoms are worsening and I want to document how severe they get.
I almost always have music in my head — never thought of it as a symptom. I just assumed everyone had it most of the time. Hmmm.